dress shopping is difficult

while finding the bride's gowns ended up being a much easier process than we'd anticipated, i can't say the same for her mother.  or her sister.  the bean is...not a dress-y kinda girl, at all.  she actually wanted to wear a suit, which would have been super cute.  although since a hawaiian wedding was in the works, we gently reminded her that the heat and humidity might make it super uncomfortable.  we searched for a jumpsuit that would work, but either we couldn't find the right color or it was too low-cut.

and so we somehow managed to talk her into sucking it up for a few hours in a dress.  we asked her if she could just wear one for the ceremony and pictures, and then she could do a costume change of her own for the reception.  she still grumbled a little, but once she said yes we found a dress she was comfortable in fairly quickly.  and of all places, it ended up being amazon to the rescue.  i have a picture of her trying it on, but i know she'll kill me if i post it and so you'll just have to wait for photos from the wedding to see what she ended up with.

as for me - well, i really wanted something short and floaty.  i didn't want any of the traditional mother-of-the-bride getups because let's face it - i may be old, but i don't have to wear a matronly gown.  i looked at countless websites, searching through bridesmaid dress options and department store gown sections.  nothing was catching my eye, but i did find something that looked like it might work on the neiman marcus website.  after checking their return policy, i went ahead and ordered it and tried it on when it arrived.

i mean...it was okay.  although the back was really bare, and i knew i wasn't going to be comfortable with all that skin showing.  i still think the dress is pretty, and if it had been a little more covered up back there i probably would have ended up wearing it.  alas, i didn't love it and so back to the store it went.

the bean and i were at the mall picking something up one day, and as i stood in line i sent her over to the dress section to see if she might find anything good.  when she came back she said "well, there was this one dress, it's orange and it has a seashell in the middle.  i dunno, you might like it."

that was quite the description, amirite?  i teased her and said "OMG, that sounds terrible!  is that the best description you can give me?" and she gave me that 14-year-old shoulder shrug and went back to perusing tiktok videos on her phone.  and once we were done at the pickup counter, i asked her to show me the dress she'd found.

"no, i don't want to show it to you now."
"aw, come on!  i want to see what you picked out for me."
"but you made so much fun of me, you're probably gonna hate it."
"well, i mean...the way you described it, it's hard to..."

and then i saw it.

OMG, it was PERFECT.  it checked all the boxes for what i was looking for, and i fell in love instantly.  but we were meeting friends for dinner and we were already running behind, so i didn't have time to try it on.  i thought maybe i could just buy it and take it home to try on, but a quick peek at the price tag told me that it was pretty far out of my budget.  bummer.

and so i kept looking.  i ordered this one from nordstrom, and it was...okay.  but still...it wasn't love.

as the weeks went by and i still hadn't found anything i liked, the old lady was starting to give me shit about it.  overhearing one of our conversations, the hub finally told me to clear an afternoon so that he could take me to buy the dress i'd loved so much.  and so we headed down to south coast plaza for some shopping and an impromptu date night.

our first stop was nordstrom, where i was unsuccessful in finding *the* dress but tried on a couple of other ensembles by the same designer.  cute, but still not quite right.

"it's okay," the hub said.  "there's a hundred other stores here to look through."  he's such a trooper.

and then we saw it - a whole store filled with zimmermann-made shoes and clothing.  and i found the dress immediately - in my size, even.

um...and another one that the hub and i both loved.

and so that's how i ended up joining the costume change club along with the bride and the bridesmaid.  hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

saying yes to the dress

so now that the big wedding is over - which i haven't recapped mostly because for some reason i don't feel ready to yet - i can do a little backtracking and share about the day we found the old lady's dress...es.  heh.

she'd seen a post about a big sample sale was going to happen at a little shop in monrovia - one that's fairly popular and known for awesome deals on beautiful gowns.  there was a whole list of guidelines for how the sale would go - each bride was allowed up to two guests.  she was allotted a whole 30 minutes to find and try on dresses, and if more time was needed she would have to get back in line for another 30-minute session.  all sales would be final, of course, and there was a small discount for paying in cash.  it was kind of a lot of pressure, but i guess they figure you either find it or you don't, and if you couldn't get it done the next person in line probably would.

and so with her childhood BFF (who was also serving as their officiant for the wedding, an idea that i absolutely adored), we arrived bright and early on a sunday morning to get in line.  the shop was scheduled to open at 9, and we got there at 7.  there was one other bride already in line ahead of us.

the time went by pretty quickly, as we chatted and giggled about wedding ideas and got all caught up on what was happening in each others' lives.  and then just before 9, a couple of employees came out to greet everyone and have them fill out a quick questionnaire.

look at how cute her bangle was - a gift from her soon-to-be MIL.

they brought in two or three brides at a time, and our clock started ticking as soon as we stepped inside.

the sales clerks really knew their stuff - they could tell each bride which racks to shop from just by a quick glance.  dresses were all separated by size, and the three of us hustled right over to start flipping through them.  it didn't take too long to find a few styles that checked the boxes that the old lady had detailed for us, and the frenzy to try on began.  

she instantly fell in love with the first and third dresses, and they both fit her like a glove and were just so  beautiful and flattering.  did i cry?  well, of course i did.  and as we continued to debate between the two dresses, it occurred to us that one of them was a perfect ceremony dress, while the other seemed destined to be worn as a reception gown.  and so that's how the old lady ended up with two dresses.

the dresses stayed zipped in the bag, hidden away from prying eyes for months in the bean's closet until it was time to take them for alterations.  the bridal shop gave her a bit of an attitude when she called to schedule fittings, which we didn't love.  a quick yelp search brought us to a little shop in brea, where the owner greeted us warmly and had her try the dresses on so that she could see what needed to be done.

a couple of months later, we returned for the second fitting.

and then, the third.  she'd been working her tail off at the gym and following a great meal plan, and the seamstress jokingly scolded her for adding to her workload.

the final fitting was a mere week before the wedding, and then we picked up the finished dresses the day before we took off for hawaii.

my baby.  sigh.

duel in the desert

cheer comp-extravaganza continued the following weekend, this time taking us to palm springs.  it was a welcome change to be more local this time, just an hour and a half-ish away from home.  we took our time leaving the house though, which ended up landing us in some traffic on the drive out.  by the time we got into the area we were all ready for dinner, and a quick yelp search took us to bubba's bones and brews for some delicious, gigantic gourmet burgers.

our home for the night was the doubletree hotel, and check-in was quick and easy with the famous chocolate chip cookies handed to us at the front desk.

we got settled in for the night and woke up bright and early the next morning to what looked like a beautiful, warm day in the desert.

i helped the bean get ready, and then we packed everything up and got outta there so that the hub could drop us off at the convention center to meet up with the team while he went off in search of some breakfast for us.

as usual, i had my cheer mom gear on along with my lucky shoes.

it was still pretty early when we arrived and the lawn area was wide open and waiting for the cheer teams to arrive.

the bean found some of her teammates, and with the coaches occupied with getting one of the other teams warmed up and checked in for their performance they started doing some warmups on their own.

we were really excited to see her former cheer coach - from her school cheer team way back when, who's become a great friend of mine.  she had come to support another friend's daughter, and when she found out that we were going to be there as well she adjusted her schedule so that she could watch our team perform.

they did a great job with their routine, as always.  it didn't go off without a hiccup or two though, and then all we could do was wait for the awards ceremony to begin.  

her team ended up taking second place this time.  

the old lady and the fiance were in the desert that weekend visiting his dad, who they'd brought with them to watch the bean's performance.  and so once everything was all done, we headed into town to have lunch together, which was a good time.  

on our way back to the car we came across the cutest little art studio.

and then we started the long drive back home so that we could get back in time to pick up the dogs from their doggy hotel.

the bean was pretty relieved to have that tripleheader of competitions behind her, and she passed out in her room as soon as we got home.  ah, the life of a competitive cheerleader.